When was the last time you experienced loving service through your Christian community? Maybe you’ve recently delivered a baby, lost a job, recovered from a severe illness, or have been laid up after surgery. Were your immediate needs met? Were you overwhelmed by a flood of gifted love only God could strum up and deliver? I hope you were bowled over and blessed every-which-way possible by both!
The old adage “walk a mile in my shoes” has blossomed with more significant meaning for me this past year than ever before. Thrust into my present-day perspective—viewing life in Christ through the lens of staggering losses and grief, the Lord continues to enlighten me further regarding serving each other with love.
You might ask, ‘Why the big deal about loving and serving all the time? Topic covered, girlfriend!’ Right?
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A Very Big Deal
The Bible is clear, good works don’t save us, but loving and serving our brothers and sisters in Christ is an authenticating proof of our love for God. [Ephesians 2:8-10, 1 John 3:13-17] Please refer to the verses and references throughout for clarity. I’m sure you’ll agree, loving our fellow believers in Christ is a very big deal!
Of course, on an experiential level, being extravagantly and ever-faithfully loved by my Christ-following communities impassions me to share, even as I am schooled by their excellent examples. And that’s just the thing. If we shy from sharing, teaching, and repeating the things God gives us, how do we inspire future generations to grow beyond us?
As much as I hesitate to highlight specific gifts given to me—because, of course, all gifts of love are treasured as God’s displayed goodness, I was brought to my spiritual knees with awe when two mamas my girls’ age, both of whom I’ve had the privilege of serving separately in the past, paired a meal together to help me in our early days of grief. I dare not describe the gift fully—words would only minimize the blessing because it was their love that reached me so deeply. Suffice my current tears to say the beauty of the gift overwhelms me to this day.
[See Shared Meals, How To Serve A Master, and How To Create A Post Baby Mini Retreat for prior discussions on serving.]
The Christ Following Life
Maybe you’ve noticed that the Biblical Christ-following life is honestly quite radical. It absolutely confounds this world’s wisdom. It bewilders those daring enough to read God’s Word stripped bare of personal biases—impossible for anyone without the aid of the Holy Spirit. And, it inconceivably demands more of us than we dare imagine, yet comparatively to Christ, it asks so very little.
Climbing out on a limb here, I don’t see Scripture calling us to some of the individualized boundary-bound traditionalism we’ve gotten cushy with here in the twenty-first century. If our serving one another isn’t revolutionary and our love outlandishly extreme, I’m not positive we’re reading the same Good Book.
While being taught and challenged by the Word regarding our every thought, motive, and deed, the Christ-following life is one built on faith in Jesus. It’s a continuous outpouring of grace, mercy, and self-sacrificing love because that’s the very life Jesus lived and the gift of His love toward us.
First Century Models
Further impressed by this topic of serving, I decided to give the book of Acts a fresh read, as well as the many supporting service-related verses scattered throughout Scripture. I can’t remember the last time I heard a sermon series on the book of Acts. You’ve probably noticed it’s laden with problematic ideals for today’s Church in the US. There’s some impressive radical living and far-out loving going on there—outrageous by modern standards! To be in Christ, to shadow His footsteps, has never represented the status quo.
Volumes can be written about meeting the needs of this world—an undeniably necessary and commendable Christ-following pursuit. However, today, I am focused solely on serving within the Church—because they are distinct. Christ-followers are known by our love. We’re brothers and sisters—a family, after all! First-century Christians communed together, giving all they had to share amongst each other—and Acts tells us no one had an unmet need. [Acts 2:44-45, 1 Peter 1:22, 1 John 3:14, 1 John 3:16]
I am not here to suggest we gather to live in local ‘Jesus people’ communes—no. I am asking why modern-day Christ-followers all too often seem comfortable with brothers and sisters living in extended unmet need? Are we, honestly, comfortable with that? Are there unmet needs in your Christ-following community?
Ignorance And Discomfort
It’s not so much that there is no care in our current-day Christian communities—I believe we indeed do care. Sometimes, we don’t think situations entirely through, or somehow, we simply can’t relate. We truly don’t know others’ needs if we haven’t been touched by something similar. If we haven’t ‘walked a mile in their shoes,’ understanding our friends’ needs takes a God-sized awakening. How pleasing would it be to God that we purposefully ask for such wisdom?
Too readily, we assume all is well when folks in tough circumstances don’t ask for help themselves. I’ve done it, and I’m guessing you might have too. We really ought to be watchful, listening, praying for wisdom and discernment, preparing ourselves, and pursuing each other in order to love well. Genuine needs often weigh heavy and feel embarrassing when they arise—too messy for those in need to allow or ask others in. To love and serve well, we must be brave enough to breach uncomfortable barriers.
I must admit, needs I didn’t previously understand have flown right past me even though God had me quickly positioned and able to serve. This doesn’t begin to account for needs that were within my reach but were less convenient and beyond awkward. I’ve had to repent of both.
Without judgment, circle around, and let’s get real for a minute…
When it comes to loving and serving, what of the more unpleasant sort? The folks in our fellowships presenting unlovely, unsanctified habits like being manipulative, critical, ungrateful, ‘sticky’ too-dependant, or incredibly presumptuous—what then? Do we push past the ick, inclining ourselves to wholeheartedly serve even these? No triteness intended; what would Jesus do?
Self-Sufficiency Vs. God-Dependency
Ignorance is a severe handicap for loving and serving, and certainly, discomfort is a reconned beast of its own—we must find ways in Christ to overcome them. But I’ve found that the highly prized yet fallacious perspective of self-sufficiency (in the sense of being personally ‘enough’) seriously limits our loving service like no other. Whether we expect it from ourselves or mentally impose its calloused standard on others, both ways reek of arrogance and are erroneously unbiblical.
God is our sufficiency, not us, in and of ourselves. He repeatedly states our dependence is on Him—whether we care to acknowledge Him or not. Frankly, we fool ourselves if we believe (or behave as though we believe) that our next breath isn’t entirely dependent on God. [Prov. 16:9, Luke 12:16-21, John 1:3, John 6:63, John 15:5, Eph.2:8, 2 Cor. 3:5,…]
I challenge you, friends, as I challenge myself, to put this love-crushing value of, ‘I don’t need you; I don’t need anyone!’ through the filter of Scripture and see what God gives you. [Gal. 5:13, Gal. 6:2, 1 John 3:18, 1 Cor. 13:2, Phil. 2:1-30, 1 Peter 4:10, Hebrews 13:16…]
Are the Biblical relationship models of kinship in Christ merely a cherry on top of our lives—or does God intend it to be more? What do Biblical God-dependency and “love of the brethren” actually look like? After considering the references above and so many more agreeing throughout Scripture, it’s fair to point out, our Creator views these things differently than we may desire in our flesh.
Embracing God’s Design
We’re prone to mercilessly judge ourselves and each other if we happen to trip into genuine need—particularly if our need is bigger than the typical 2.5 meals per week for two weeks on the local church Women’s Ministry calendar. But if one of the primary ways God provides care for His people is to ask them to serve each other in love—why do we get so put off and sniffy about the whole thing?
Unfortunately, we have an audacious inclination to grab and stuff cultural ideals fed to us by various philosophies, media, and widely promoted societal norms. Somehow we don’t readily recognize these tempting morsels have nothing to do with God’s perfect design. They merely delight our pride.
Giving And Receiving
Maybe you are already an awesome, outrageous, radical love giver. Perhaps you already pour out all God gives you of spare time and money—the first one offering a meal, the first to show up at the hospital with open arms, and the first to grab a broom…(Ha! I have a friend who insists she has the ‘gift of toilets.’ I’m telling you, you’ll catch an elbow if you get in her way!). Such givers are some of the most beautiful, Spirit-filled people on the planet. I hope you have more than a few of them in your life—you’d be abundantly blessed!
Obviously, for every lover to love, servant to serve, or giver to give, there must be a recipient willing to receive.
If God allows you to be in a position of need, it’s an amazing sight to surrender and watch Him provide through His people. Nobody wants to experience need, but inevitably this broken world delivers. It’s true, sometimes God still delivers through direct miracles. More commonly, He delights in His people loving and serving each other as He directs us with His Word.
Boundaries Vs. Limitations
Mention love, difficulty, pain, and the laying down of one’s self for another, and the topic of personal boundaries inevitably edges its way in. Loving as Jesus loves will never make sense to the values of this world. While nobody with a healthy mind and spirit would want themselves or another to suffer in any way, grasping and living from the heart of Jesus is a work of the Spirit.
We see Jesus in ministry slip away to rest and to avoid trouble before it’s time, but the Man ultimately came to lay his life down and die for our good—He did that and more. [Eph. 5:2] Does God expect this sort of love in the literal sense from his followers? My understanding is—sometimes. Taking the whole of Scripture into account, this is a great question to ask the Holy Spirit to illuminate.
Boundaries have their place when they are established for the best good of another, as in God’s boundaries on us, parent-to-child boundaries, and boundaries between good and evil. However, broadly accepted today within the church and otherwise, the social meaning of ‘personal boundaries’ contains an element of self-promotion or putting one’s self first that really should put our self-sacrificing love on high alert.
As my mama often said, ‘Something doesn’t jive!’
Much to the loving servant-hearteds’ chagrin, there are seasons and circumstances in life that limit our ever-human serving ability. Can the bankrupt financially support, the broken and diseased scrub floors on their knees, or scale up and down ladders in order to aid fellow believers in need? These represent genuine limitations.
We aren’t called to determine or judge each others’ hesitancies toward love and service but, most certainly, before the Lord, consider your own. Before God alone, sometimes my limitations demand a bowing out, while other times I can dive in, ready to love wholeheartedly, giving everything I’ve got and more. With the over-arching intent of your life displaying God’s goodness, you’ll have your personal factors to weigh and discern with the Lord.
Weeping And Rejoicing
As you begin reading over the following list of suggestions, notice that not all serving with love is related to a trial or problem. Romans 12:15 directs us to ‘rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those that weep.’ Some examples of community service are serving those who are celebrating—a new baby, a graduation, a wedding, or a new home.
The Scripture examples offered speak directly from God’s perspective on serving and will more fully explain His heart on the matter.
Our day in time presents many challenges to serving. Schedules packed with work, school, extracurricular anything, and everything, you name it… it isn’t easy to know where to start. Use the following table of suggestions to inspire and motivate your care for fellow saints—it is not intended to be comprehensive or conscience binding. Then use your life experience, your gratefulness, and your creative imagination to grow in your compassionate service and love.
If you have more ideas or examples from your community, please offer them in the comments for all to see!
[Deut. 15:11, Isa. 1:17, Prov. 19:17, Matt. 5:16, Matt. 23:11, Matt. 25:35-40, Mark 10:45, Luke 6:38, Acts 20:35, Rom. 12:9-13, Rom. 15:1, Gal. 5:13, Gal. 6:2, Eph. 2:10, Eph. 4:28, Phil. 2:1-11, Col. 3:23-24, Hebrews 6:10, Hebrews 13:16, 1 Thess. 5:11, James 2:14-17…]
Examples Of Serving With Love
Be a reliable light in the darkness.
Lead/Protect—Shepherds and Leaders, please show up! Share in joy, and share in sorrow. Guide, protect, and provide care (through others if you must) for the people God gives you.
Comfort—sit, listen, and speak words of care.
Counsel with God’s Word
Co-labor in Prayer
Cards/Notes/Texts/Phone Calls
Missionary Furlough Care—personal and spiritual encouragement, financial assistance, housing, transportation, moving assistance, storage space, co-laboring, meals, intentional relationship building
Illness/Injury/Post Surgery Care—meals, household chores, yard chores, child care, personal and spiritual encouragement
Hospital Care—visiting, advocacy, personal and spiritual encouragement, comfort
Physical Health Care—visiting, advocacy, personal and spiritual encouragement, transportation, meals, physical care
Mental Health Care—advocacy, personal and spiritual encouragement, meals, childcare, household chores, yard chores, transportation.
Elderly Caregiver Support—meals, personal and spiritual encouragement, household chores, yard chores, elder-sitting, childcare, date night gift cards.
Overwhelm/Discouraged—personal and spiritual encouragement, household chores, yard chores, childcare, meals
New Birth/Extended Birth Care—meals, sibling childcare, household chores, yard chores, personal and spiritual encouragement, celebrate(!)
Adoption Care—financial gifts, personal and spiritual encouragement, sibling childcare, household chores, yard chores, meals, celebrate(!)
Death/Loss Care*—financial aid, meals, household chores, yard chores, out-of-town guest hosting, listening, professional recommendations, spiritual and emotional care, ongoing invitations for fellowship
Single Parenting*—spiritual and emotional care, listening, childcare, pet-sitting, intentional relationship building, ongoing invitations for fellowship, household repair, emergency support, protection
Divorce/Abandonment Care*—personal and spiritual encouragement, ongoing invitations for fellowship, listening, meals, household chores and repair, yard chores, emergency support, protection
Graduation/Achievement—encouragement, prep help, celebrate(!), clean-up
Weddings—encouragement, resource recommendations, prep help, out-of-town guest hosting, celebrate(!), clean up
Job Loss/Financial Needs—encouragement, recommendations, financial assistance, groceries, utilities, broken essential household items, auto repairs, transportation
Moving Assistance—co-labor, meals, encouragement.
Pets—encouragement, listening, recommendations, pet-sitting
Legal Trouble—professional recommendations, personal and spiritual encouragement, camaraderie, financial assistance
*Long-term, potentially life-long care needs
An Over The Top Example Of Love
I’ve shared bits and pieces this past year while grieving the loss of Stache, of how beautifully my communities have cared for my family and me. I promised some time ago, to share the story of our servant-hearted family and friends who blessed me far beyond the imaginable with a home renovation that met a genuine need, giving me independence and encouraging my heart.
LONG story short, our little farm cottage (not so little anymore) once housed a meager laundry ‘area’ down in the dark, damp webby-depths of our unfinished basement. Having a lengthy list of honest, shall we say, ‘incompatibilities’ with the laundry setup, Stache rescued me each week by washing and drying our laundry, and carrying it upstairs for me to put away—often successfully.
Heroic, as you know him to be, Stache tried to ban all house guests from ‘the pit.’ Sure enough, because they had no idea, they inevitably insisted on trying the basement at least once—too hesitant to hand off their dirty laundry. Excepting only the stoutest of souls, all that silliness ebbed completely away once they got an eyeful. I’m telling you, it had few redeeming qualities.
On top of this one dreadful caveat to peaceful country living, for nearly seventeen years, we managed life with one bathroom—for our original family of seven, plus our four bonus loves and our ten ‘grands,’ not to mention the random house guests we love to serve. It was a lovely bathroom in its day—walls, shower, and bath covered in sweet peach 4×4 ceramic tiles trimmed in rust, all finished with a modest parquet tiled floor—built originally in the mid-’40s for a household of three.
Being a random guest in our home, perhaps invited for coffee and a chat, it was no rare occasion to be asked mid-sip by one of our kids, “Uh, excuse me, do you need to use the restroom?” Surprised, new guests often blushed a bit buggy-eyed over the rim of their steamy mug. Thankfully, it didn’t take long for folks to get comfortable with our forward ways because adults and teens alike routinely collected a short line for ‘The Necessary’ before they could take up extended residence in the shower.
Aware of our circumstances, when Stache passed, within the few days before the family traveled from California to be by our side, Stache’s siblings had crafted a tentative remodel plan to return in the summer (2022) and build a main-level laundry room that was safe for me to use. Gratefully agreeing with the plan, using the original footprint of our home by restructuring our back sunporch and the original single-car garage, I boldly asked for the luxury of an additional bathroom to be added as well.
After several months of one sister designing, sketching, and collecting a massive number of long-distance measures—gifted professional plans were drawn, permits miraculously pulled, materials ordered and purchased, and necessary professionals lined up. The project involved multiple folks traveling to serve from California, Ohio, and Tennessee, with local Hoosiers offering support, skills, tools, and guest hosting for weeks. Along with these, a brand spanking new washer and dryer set was gifted, and another sister graciously booted me out of my kitchen for the duration. She planned meals, grocery shopped, and with only a tiny rotating team of support, fed the starving masses throughout the entire project.
I’m embarrassed to admit it, but being a mere six months after losing Stache, I barely lifted a finger other than to push a few ‘buy now’ buttons, quickly becoming the primary 2022 gold-star profits contributor for all of Hamilton County, Corporate Home Depot, Lamps Plus, and several small-town trades. One of my sons insists, I also single-handedly employed the local UPS guy full-time, but I think that’s a little optimistic.
All to say, I made a whole lot of decisions, spent necessary funds, slept like a teenager, and basically repeated thank-you’s, morning, noon, and night. Thankfully, most of my grieving ‘zombie days’ have left me. But as you can infer, our people carried me with such generous love and so much grace.
Today, I am as independent in my own home as I can be, and my family and guests have a beautiful, functional laundry and the comforting luxury of a second bathroom—although, after seventeen years of asking, we still randomly warn each other when we want a shower.
The remodel was a huge God-gifted endeavor requiring a whole bunch of compassionate folks to give of their time and strength far beyond any norm I’ve ever seen. Because of the scope and impact these loved ones had on my home and heart, God’s goodness is seen, experienced, and appreciated every single day.💕
Conclusion
In big ways and small, I hope you are inspired!
From the simplest text of acknowledgment to the most astounding gifts of co-laboring or financial provision, every service with love is ultimately a gift from God, displaying the goodness of God [James 1:17]. Dear sisters, we all need these reminders and encouragement. We give gifts of love from that which He first gave us. Living a life of loving service to others is heavenly beautiful.
Don’t forget! I would love to hear your personal examples.
All to God’s glory and never our own,
~Grammie🌻
it was a blessing to serve together with family and friends and to see your home come together a new way. serving one another brings true joy. I love you💜
I love you, Alice! I hope you have gained truck loads of joy over the years–all to my benefit.💕 You have taught me so many great examples.🎁
I love this one! So thoughtful. Much love and congratulations on the project’s completion!
Ahhh, thanks Will! And thanks again for all of your generous help!💕
It was a blast to meet you and your family and get a little Indiana sun as we “measured once and cut twice.” Kim and I were blessed. Thank you for allowing us to be there!
Goodness! Thank you for commenting, Ted. I was so thankful you and Kim were here!! You were both an incredible help and support. So glad to hear the two of you were blessed as well.💛
Thanks. Enjoyed the read and photos. Good reminders. Hugs, Love and Laughter.
Thank you, Cindy! I’m so glad you enjoyed the post and found it helpful.💕
This is such a beautiful read. Thank you again for sharing your heart ❤️.
I can’t help but believe your Alan is equally blessed by the way your Christian community has supported you.
God is so good to us.
Thank you for your comments, Deanna! Yes. Yes, God is so very good to us.💕